Parenting is hard. It is also amazing, funny, beautiful, and a choice that my husband and I willingly made, but it is still hard. Every parent has different battles. Some struggle with sleeping, some with picky eaters, some with homework and so on. Our house always has and still struggles with bedtime and sleep. One area we do not struggle with for the most part is eating new and healthy foods. I realize there are food allergies, medical conditions, and other issues that I am likely not aware of when it comes to picky eating. And by no means do I have all the answers for parents who struggle with picky eating. However, based on my experience, I do think that I have helped my kids become healthy and adventurous eaters by implementing the following principles.
- Exposure. This is likely the most common tip given to parents of picky eaters, but I believe it really does hold true. Research varies on the amount of times kids need to be exposed to a specific food to increase their likelihood of trying and liking it, but exposure does matter. Just as adult’s taste change, so can children’s. I also realize that there are certain foods that kids and adults might never like (for me…ALL types of olives) but in general exposure is important and helpful. I remember when my kids were toddlers and one day, they loved scrambled eggs and the next day they would not touch it. Even today, my kids tastes, and preferences are changing. My son is no longer a fan of shrimp but now loves sautéed onions and peppers. Keep trying as their tastes change. Keep adding new foods to their plates or trying different recipes. They do not have to eat a huge amount to be exposed. This past week I stir-fried some bok choy we grew in our garden with garlic and soy sauce. I asked both kids if they just wanted to try a bite, they agreed, and both loved it. They only took a few bites, but they now have been exposed to a new food and maybe next time will eat even more.
- Always serve something they like. Regardless of what I am serving for dinner, I always serve it along with something they like. I have done this since they first started eating solid foods. This can be as simple as their favorite fruit or vegetable but there is always something on their plate that I know they will like and eat. I believe this removes some of the stress out of the meal. Meals can be anxiety producing for kids who do not like trying new foods so if they can at least look at their plate and see something they love, it helps reduce the stress of the overall meal for both parents and children.
- GET THEM INVOLVED! This is probably my most important tip. There are SO many ways kids can be involved in the meals in your household.
- Meal planning-I ask my kids and husband what is one thing they would like for dinner that week and then I agree to make it (within reason).
- Grocery shopping-I also ask if there is anything they would like me to get at the grocery store and try to oblige (within reason). This is usually specific to what kind of fruits and vegetables they would like or a particular snack.
- Grow something. My husband is the gardener in the family as he has loved gardening since he was a kid. Each year our garden seems to expand but more importantly the kids have started to be involved and enjoy it. The kids help pick out what to plant and they start seeds inside and help care for them. They then help transition everything outside. They help pick the produce once ready. I realize that not everyone has the room or desire for a garden but there are tons of simple ways kids can grow something. Windowsill herbs or other small container plants are both a great way to start.
- Have them help at mealtime. This can be as simple as helping set and clearing the table or helping prep the food. My son has recently liked helping with the prep work and then stirring on the stove top, so he feels that he is doing the actual cooking.
Getting them involved in any of these ways helps them have ownership of the process. Kids who are involved in mealtime are also more likely to eat what they have helped grow and make.
4. Daily Food Commitments. This concept, from my dear friend and colleague Jill Coleman’s #Moderation365 Curriculum is about making daily nutrition commitments that are simple but impactful. My family eats vegetables and fruit at lunch and dinner every day. I do not call this a rule as I am not a fan of any food rules as I think it leads to obsession and other issues. But my family is committed to eating vegetables and fruit at least 2 of our meals each day. I simply ask what vegetable and fruit they would like in their lunch when packing it or preparing it at home and then I always have a vegetable served at dinner as well. This is just how it is in our house. It has become a habit and my kids know they need to select a fruit and vegetable for each meal. I hope it is so ingrained that they continue this habit when I am no longer responsible for their meals.
5. Keep Trying. Mealtimes can be hard. Picky eating is hard but please, keep trying. Just like many behaviors, kids learn food and eating behaviors when they are young, and their parents are their greatest influence. Teaching basic cooking skills and healthy eating habits is truly a life lesson that will serve your kids throughout their lifetime. Keep trying, it matters.
